Men, we love you.
Therapist Arianne Washington gets real about addressing Men’s Mental Health, “The reality is you’re afraid, but only in the beginning.”
Studies show 40% of men won't talk to anyone about their mental health.
NEW ORLEANS (June 26, 2023)- Arianne Washington, a licensed therapist, and owner of Elite Therapy, spoke candidly with her men throughout Men’s Mental Health Month to get down to the real reasons why many men are reluctant to talk about their mental health or seek therapy, and what she found was surprising.
According to Mental Health America, more than 6 million men suffer from depression, 14.3% of men have a form of anxiety disorder, 90% of those diagnosed with schizophrenia by age 30 are men and 80% of all completed suicides in the U.S. are by men. Yet, men are less likely than women to seek help for depression, substance use, and stressful life events due to social norms, downplaying symptoms, and reluctance to talk.
Washington asked men to open up about mental health as a whole and the personal issues they face when it comes to addressing their mental health. Throughout her research, most men said they experience anxiety when it comes to navigating the workforce, parenting, being vulnerable, and meeting expectations as a provider.
“Most of my clients said they struggle with finding their place in the workplace. In their homes, they’re comfortable being themselves, but at work, the pressures of being a buttoned-up professional create insecurity because it feels unnatural,” Washington said.
“They also said they don’t feel empowered as fathers or feel confident in their role to make decisions about their child’s well-being, whether in the household or co-parenting,” Washington said. “Even when it comes to pregnancy and after birth, they struggle with wondering, ‘Where do I fit into this equation.’”
As providers for their families, Washington said most men feel pressure, whether it’s from self-imposed expectations or the expectation that society has put on them.
“When you are the rock, there isn’t a space to say ‘I’m scared,’ ‘I don't know what to do or how to solve this.’ Men feel they have to be strong and have it all together to protect their loved ones, all while suffering from anxiety and still showing up as a friend, husband, father, son, or businessman.”
Washington has worked with men from all walks of life throughout her career and said they often express they do not feel safe, supported, or understood.
“There are men who want mentorship from other men but don’t feel safe enough to be vulnerable and ask for help.”
She advises men to move through their fear to seek the help they need.
“You are going to have to do it afraid if that is reaching out for help or articulating to your partner what is bothering you,” Washington said. “The reality is you are afraid, but only in the beginning. It is new and you’re going to have a level of anxiousness. Instead of avoiding it, communicate through it.”
Washington adds that therapy goes a long way to better understand your communication style and learn techniques to better communicate and get desired outcomes. Also, she encourages men to build a community of support with like-minded people at social clubs, group therapy, retreats, or special interest groups.
